…because I can’t. And I get paid to speak for a living!
I mean, I can read the whole thing but after about two paragraphs the words start coming out wrong, the swear words start replacing them…and I find myself reaching for a bottle of Advil thanks to the headache caused by the English language.
First appearing in a textbook in 1920, “The Chaos” is a poem which demonstrates the irregularity of English spelling and pronunciation, written by Gerard Nolst Trenité. Here’s a selection.
See what I mean?! And it goes on like that… Read the full version of “The Chaos” here! Or listen to a true English master read it for you below!